Samantha and I picked Ella up at 4:30 today from basketball. We found Ella in tears because the ball had just hit her in the head while shooting around waiting for us. After consoling her we went to gather her things. Samantha, who has a bit of a "kick her while she's down" personality, out-of-the blue hit Ella and grabbed the NBA basketball card Ella's coach had just given her. Ella, who under normal circumstances could have handled the situation, melted even further. Although I addressed the situation, Ella was downright angry with Sam. She refused to sit with her in the van, declared she no longer wanted to share a bedroom with her, and demanded that she needed alone time away from her when we got home. In order to give Ella some regrouping time, I kept Sam occupied downstairs so Ella could be alone in her room for a little while. I got started making dinner, while Sam sat in the kitchen, lamenting that she had no one to play her Dora memory game with.
After a little while, I suggested to Sam that she go upstairs and invite Ella to come down and have an M&M yogurt with her (a prized treat in our house), which she did. The girls came down, with Ella still a little pouty. They, on opposite ends of the kitchen table bench, began to eat their yogurts. It took no more than 2 minutes for their little hearts to soften. I was a mere observer as I was busily putting dinner together, and I watched the hurt between them evaporate. Ella counted her M&M's and portioned out some to give Sam, so she could have some extra. They gradually scooted closer together on the bench, and in no time, Sam's arm wrapped around Ella, leaned her head on Ella's shoulder and said "I love you Ella". They slurped up their yogurts and ran off holding hands, while making plans of reading books together and making a fort upstairs. It was classic. A little moment that makes you feel like you are hands down the best mother to grace this green earth.
And so this evening I thought about how many disagreements and arguments are in their future. I realize the arguments will only increase in intensity: a missing sweater, hogging bathroom time, an older sister refusing to drive a younger sister somewhere. In fact, even when you're all grown up, there will always be differences. I wrote my sister an e-mail just last night begging for forgiveness for changing my mind AGAIN regarding our summer plans. I asked that she not be mad at me and reminded her that she is stuck with me forever. F-O-R-E-V-E-R. And does she really want to spend forever mad at me? (She wasn't mad at all and was quite gracious and understanding about the change.)
I know that all the little disagreements in my girls' futures will only bind them closer together. Funny how forgiving someone does that. That's not something I can teach, just something they'll have to learn for themselves. For now, my job is to have a lot of M&M yogurt on hand.
